How many times have you pinned yourself in one spot avoided doing exactly what you have been planning. Self sabotage is so common yet so rare because we do not talk about it. Most people struggle with this and end up finding reasons to blame others or their situations.

What is stopping you? Is it fear of failure or fear of starting? Whatever it is just do not give a moment in your thoughts. This can block you from doing things that you have been planning for in a very long time.

Now let us look at how you can break the pattern of self sabotaging.

ASSESS YOUR BEHAVIOR: you are the only one with an ability to know and acknowledge that there are certain behaviors that you are allowing that stop you from starting or doing things. Look at the things that you do that have an impact on you slowing down or losing interest in achieving your goals. This will hard because you’re going to be giving excuse for every wrong behavior and you do not need to. Allow yourself to sense the wrong in not giving yourself a chance to do what you have plans of doing.

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WHAT CAUSES THE SABOTAGING BEHAVIOR: Now, we do most things and act a certain way because of particular influences. Get to know your influence and know which behavior pattern it encourages. When you are able to tell the root cause of the behavior that sabotages your own goals and plans it will be easy to help yourself out of the self sabotage pit. As written above you might happen to have excuses for behaviors that you are not ready to part with but it is a matter of trying. Dig deeper into what is stopping you from going ahead. Look for the root cause even in unexpected areas because it is a slow process and everything has to be put on the table to avoid relapses and backsliding.

INTROSPECTION. How about a little look into who really are and what you are really doing. Some self-reflection will not hurt. Take time to asses your life and what you want. Look deep into what you have been trying to achieve and what has been stopping you. Try by all means not to bring anything outside of yourself as a reason to why you are not going forward. Give the attention to yourself and then work on it. Be fair, do not pressurise yourself. Remember you are trying to solve a problem within you and not creating a bad space for your progress. Look at habits that have been hindering you from starting on your plans or keeping you away from doing the work that is needed to progress.

POSITIVITY IN YOU: There is an inner voice in you that constantly reminds you that you have to get up and start working on your dreams but the above mentioned traits about behaviors is what suppresses it. The bad habits take space of this positive voice inside you and you have given them a go ahead. Start listening to the inner you and pay attention to the positive attitude it brings. This might get tiring as you will sometimes need a second opinion but also lean to listen to your own advice that comes from within. There is nothing wrong with taking your own advice and try it. There is that inner voice inside you that wants you to make it and win in life , give it a chance.

MAKE BEHAVIOR PATTERNS THAT WORK FOR YOU: You have identified behavior patterns that are working against you and you need to change them and make something that works in your favour. Work hard on making the right decisions. You know what tickles your fancy and that is what you need to work on first. Do not be hard on yourself and do not be be too soft also. The best way to come up with what works is to think about the reasons you need to do it. Remind yourself why you are doing it and what you are looking to achieve. Despite having identified the patterns that slow you down turn to ones that give you a reason.

START MAKING SMALL CHANGES: The journey of making your plans work will not start until you start taking your first steps. Begin with make small changes on your behavior patterns and doing little activities that align with what you want to achieve. It is the small steps that will determine if you are ready to work on it or you need to adjust. Baby steps are meant to get you ready for the big job of working towards your goals and dreams. When you do all this start taking note of what brings you joy, the importance of this is to know what activities keep you going. Start also taking notes of where you are falling behind and what you could do to pull yourself up.

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PLAN YOUR GOAL AND THE ROAD MAP: You have settled into your route and ready to make it work. Set goals that are relevant to the main goal. If you had no main goal set this is the the time to do so since you have picked your rhythm and ready to make way for yourself. Self sabotage can take a lot from a a person. The dreams that you had cancelled before you started and all the things you thought were impossible can now be taken head on. You need to look how far you have come and use the same strength to keep moving. work on the goals and follow the road map you have outlined for yourself.

Do not be afraid to fail. Working on making it is not mistake proof. We need the results to be perfect that means mistakes will be made and corrections will also be made. It is up to you to keep soaring high after fighting off self sabotage habits and letting those bad habits go and introduce what works and what works for you as an individual.


Thero M

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